Staying Grounded
One of the best actions we can take, with courage, is to relax. ~Yogi tea
With everything going on in your life, it is sometimes hard to stay grounded.
Whether it be work stress, family stress, or just plain concern about what is going on around you, there is plenty of worry to deal with. And trying to stay on an even keel and not get overly upset or the opposite, not caring about anything, can often be difficult to deal with.
I have been fortunate in that those who care most about me have helped me to stay grounded. I don’t always agree at first with what they might say or do to make it so, but in more cases than not they are right and help me to stay calm even in the most trying of times or circumstances.
I am by nature a little hot headed and do have a temper.
I am also someone who hates to wait on people or things to happen. It’s not instantaneous gratification that I am looking for, but more, let’s get going and get it done. Why wait or delay what needs to be done?
I also hate to lose, especially if it is because of some injustice that caused the loss. A poorly officiated game or some bone headed decision or action can cause me to see red. That is when I most need the calming influence of those closest to me. Without that I might just say the or do the wrong thing which in the end can make matters even worse.
Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at the moment. — Ekhart Tolle
There are a lot of people who keep me grounded. For starters, there are my friends, those who care enough about me to tell me when I am wrong and should reconsider what I am thinking or saying. They provide an outside perspective on what is going on and are looking out for me and my best interests.
Next is my family. My children have grown and matured into aware and intelligent adults. They remember the life lessons I shared with them as they grew up and aren’t afraid to remind me that what I once told them applies to me as well. They are my conscience and reminder that I should do as I say, the same thing I expect from them.
Then there is my wife, my life partner and my best friend. She definitely has no problem telling me when I am wrong and how I need to calm it down. Since I met and fell in love with her, she has always seen the best and the worst in me and has dealt with both for our entire relationship.
She has always been my rock and supported me in the worst of times when others were not so willing to do so. I don’t always accept her advice at first, but as I think about it over time, she is right a large majority of the time.
Lastly, are my pets. Pets you wonder! Yup.
My dog, Kia was very interesting. If I yelled at something on TV, she took off, afraid that I was mad at her. My wife always knew I was watching something that made me unhappy and she was the refuge for my timid pet.
But if during the night something was bothering me so that I couldn’t sleep, Kia was there and stayed with me until my uneasiness was over or I just decided it was time to go back to sleep. She never left my side and just having her there was comforting.
Unfortunately, we lost Kia to cancer. But stepping in to fill the void was our other dog, Beemer. From the day we adopted him, he wanted to be as close to me as Kia, but she was there first and was dominant in her attention and affection to me. After she departed, Beemer stepped right into the role.
Beemer actually does even more than Kia did. He also stays up with me when I cannot sleep. But, unlike Kia, he doesn’t run when I yell at something stupid on the boob tube. Instead, no matter where he is in the house, he comes to me and curls up on my lap.
He then looks at me as if to say, “Everything is all right. Don’t get so stressed. It really isn’t worth it. Look at me. I am calm and nothing those people can say or do will change that.” That is quite a bit to take from one look, but it works. I calm down and move on.
Those are the people and things that keep me grounded and calm. I have also learned that getting too overwrought about anything, does little to change the situation and can actually make things worse instead of better.
I still remember when I was the Quality Director at Crayola LLC. We had problems with some boxes and were unable to run a certain product because of it. I went out on the production floor and saw the situation for myself.
Realizing that the other boxes we had in inventory were just as bad, there wasn’t anything to do, but run another item until we could get new, good boxes from the manufacturer. That would take days or even weeks to do so.
I told the production manager what to do. While I was angry at the situation and the supplier, I wasn’t ranting and raving. I was quite calm about things. The manger looked at me and said, “I guess you really don’t care about this problem, do you?”
I faced many problems every day. I learned that if I exploded every time something went wrong, it didn’t change the situation and it kept me from moving one step closer to a heart attack.
I told him that while I cared very deeply about the problem, ranting and raving would get nothing done. I talked to our purchasing person and we got new boxes very quickly and were back in business. And I kept my calm and cool the whole time.
As Rudyard Kipling once wrote:
“If you can keep your wits about you while all others are losing theirs, and blaming you. The world will be yours and everything in it, what’s more, you’ll be a man, my son.”
That is what being grounded is all about.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Peter H. Christian was a founding partner and president of espi, a business consulting firm in Northeastern PA. Previously he was an Executive at Crayola Corporation. He has worked with 300+ clients in business development, profit improvement, operations, IS selection and implementation, and Project Management. He has 40+ years of experience in strategic and facility planning, CI, lean, and supply chain. He has helped companies to realize millions of dollars in cost reductions and profit improvements adding and retaining thousands of jobs. He has authored the Amazon bestselling business books, “What About the Vermin Problem?” and “Influences and Influencers” and is published in a variety of professional magazines. He is most appreciative of Dr. Rodney Ridley and Donald Schalk of the O’Pake Institute, Alvernia University for their support in allowing him to teach this important course.
